Lololol what a week

a 5 minute freewrite of sorts

Here’s a little writing sprint for you. I usually keep these to myself, but the world is bonquitos burritos so I’m setting a timer for five minutes and just typing. I’ll correct for spelling errors but that’s it! If you enjoy this type of thing, try it for yourself in your journal or on the back of your latest CVS receipt, etc.

Ready? Steady? Goooo!

FIVE MINUTES OF SPEED- TYPING

What a motherfucker of a week. ANYWAY…I barely slept, but I did try. I traveled. It’s pretty out right now on this deck. I can see trees and grass and hear at least three different types of birds, as well as cicadas and probably the pitter-patter of little deer hooves and rabbit feets if I listen hard enough.

It’s cooler on the East Coast right now, at least in the shade. I like that. It smells like home to me.

My brother always said we’re not ocean people or lake people, we’ve river people. I think he’s right. In my opinion, it isn’t that we don’t love an ocean or a (non-gross, large, healthy) lake. It’s that we’re used to rivers, the smell of the muddy banks and the sight of consistent movement.

We are not pond people. Or moat people, although I did once live in a castle for four months that had an inner moat and an outer moat. I later dropped out of the college that sent me there, but I had some real good times while it lasted.

I keep forgetting that I have therapy this morning. Thank you, telehealth! I keep noticing that I’m finally aware, sometimes, when my neck and upper back muscles tense in reaction to a stressor. It’s taken seven years of near-daily mindfulness meditation, five and a half years of sobriety, five years of the aforementioned therapy and about six weeks of very expensive private Pilates once or twice a week for me to get to this point, but I have begun to notice!

I tend to think I’m happier around trees, but I’ve also been suicidally depressed when living amidst natural things, so perhaps it’s more accurate to say that I need a regular dose of trees in order to be truly alive, and you can be truly alive when you want to kill yourself. I do not currently want to be dead, so that’s a win.

And there’s the timer.

Thanks for being here.

More soon.

Love,

Sara

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